Chapter 4: Living with grief
Daily life and routine
I used to play music every day in the house, but after my friend’s suicide, I stopped. When I started again, I wondered if it was okay.
The house feels so different without him here. I start my day with a cup of coffee in his favourite mug and I think about him. Somehow, it makes me feel so close to him.
When someone has died, you may feel a sense of change and disruption to your daily life. You might have discovered that you don’t have the energy or interest for your old routines or daily tasks. Whether it’s going to work, taking out the garbage, or attending a yoga class, you may find your usual rhythm is now different.
What may help
- Acknowledge that your usual routines may not work for you now. You may take find new routines, either for the short or long term. You may or may not return to old ones you had.
- Let others know what you need and how they can support you as you.
- Remind yourself that paying attention to your needs is an important part of coping and living with grief.
- Spend time with others who support you in your grief – whether you feel like talking or not.
- Go at your own pace. Find a rhythm that works for you when taking part in daily tasks or other activities.
- Include daily rituals that feel good or comfortable to you. This could be a simple morning coffee, a walk outside, or writing in a journal.