Chapter 4: Finding your way forward

Remembering and honouring your friend

We’ve been there
Jean and Omo talk about the importance of remembering Stella, their son's friend who died.(3:22)Video transcript
Omo talks about activities to remember Stella.(3:22)Video transcript

When I think about him now, I smile at how good my memories of him are. I focus on the beautiful memories. Those are the ones that made me miss him so much.

Our friendship was so special. We had our ups and downs over the years, but we were together through it all. I could never forget her and all that we shared.

Although your friend has died and is no longer physically present in your life, you can create a different kind of relationship with them. You might find it helpful to think about the “legacy” that your friend has left: What did you learn from them? What impact did their life have on you or others?

You might find it comforting to have a keepsake, such as a photograph, a song, a piece of clothing or jewellery, or anything that belonged to your friend; or you can create something new that honours and reminds you of them.

Over time, as you make new friends or as another relationship deepens, you may wonder if you’re somehow betraying your friend who died. Consider how you might carry your friend’s legacy forward in new or existing relationships. What would your friend want for you now?

Helpful resources
Remembering and Honouring – article from Canadian Virtual Hospice