Chapter 3: If you’re a grandparent

Double the grief

The grief expert says
Carol speaks about providing support to grieving grandparents.(3:22)Video transcript

My mom and I are still at a point where we're trying to protect each other. At the same time, I'm having to teach her. When she says something hurtful, I have to stop and tell her what she could say instead.

My heart broke for my son and daughter in-law. They wanted a baby so badly and I wanted to be a grandmother.

In addition to your own grief, you are likely also grieving for your child. As you try to support them, there may be times when you feel like a “forgotten mourner.” It’s important for you to make space for your own grief and express your feelings in ways that work best for you. This may mean talking with your spouse or a trusted friend or using creative or physical activities as an outlet for your grief. Below are some suggestions that can help you as you move through your own grief.

More than likely, you will be able to work through your grief more quickly than your child; but you may continue to witness your child’s grief for some time. Your compassionate, loving support can make a significant difference to their healing.