Talking about unresolved issues or conflicts is not easy near the end of life. Think about what is realistic to expect. If the person who is dying has never said he loves you, he possibly never will. You might forgive each other for longstanding hurts. Sometimes, given our history, the best we can hope for is to be in the same room without arguing.

Remember that there likely will always be some unfinished business between you and the person who is dying. While you cannot solve everything, you may find a way to say what matters most. Although you cannot control how someone else thinks and responds, you can control what you say and do.