Chapter 1: How can I move through this loss?

Rethinking your personal story

People tell me that I must be getting better because I am no longer telling them the same story I was right after he died. Back then, I was convinced that I could not go on. Now I am telling people about some new projects I have going. It feels good to see how much progress I have made.

If you ask someone to tell you about themselves, expect a story. The story will probably be a sketch of how they spend their days, their work and the key people in their lives. When a death occurs, a major person in our story is no longer there in the same way. As the story of our lives shift, so do we.

As we move through grief, the story we tell changes. Thinking about how the story of your grief has changed over time can help you see how you have progressed.

Grief may feel like a long, difficult voyage. You are forced to adapt and learn how to make your way in a new world that can feel like it is against you. Moving forward requires courage and a willingness to change. In the end, you will simply do the best you can. Life is always a work in progress!