Chapter 3: How your sibling’s death may affect you
If you are a young adult
For my older daughter, it wasn’t just the loss of her younger brother. He was her best friend. She always said, “He is my person.”
My friends don’t get why I don’t want to hang out with them much these days. I feel like my life is so different from theirs ever since my sister died. I don’t think they really want to hear about my grief, and the things they talk about are unimportant to me now.
You may be the only one in your group of friends who has experienced grief at all, let alone the experience of a brother or sister dying. Your friends may be very helpful and supportive, or they may feel unsure about what to say or do. You may feel like they don’t understand and that you are alone.
Click on the tabs to view some examples of feelings you might have.
…you might feel annoyed or irritated because your life has changed so dramatically, and those things no longer have any appeal for you.
…you might feel upset, thinking that they are being insensitive.
…you might feel you are being left out or excluded.
… you might feel frustrated or disappointed.
Most people who care about you want to be supportive, but they may not always get it right. Try to let them know what you need and want (and what you don’t).
Some of your friends may find your grief scary because if this happened to you, it could happen to them. It makes death more real for everyone.
You may want to look to older family members or friends who have experienced and learned from grief.